It Seems Like Years Since It's Been Clear

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Run around yelling "I'M THE PRESIDENT, BITCH! GIMME CANDY!"

And people would give me candy.

-6:55 AM

SINCE WHEN HAVE BOTTLECAPS (the candy) BEEN THIS SMALL? WHOSE DECISION WAS THIS? WHAT HO NEEDS TO BE SLAPPED???

-12:45 AM

Kylie Minogue wants me to get fat and rot out my teeth. I know this because the songs Cherry Bomb and Chocolate are both filled with sugary imagery. Oh, Kylie, why do you torment me so?

I think I have a cavity. I have a dentist's appointment next week for a cleaning, which I do need, but I think I'll switch it for a cavity-filling appointment instead because I am poor and can't afford both.
I can has healthcare reform now plzkthnx?

Also, the nails on my index finger and middle finger on my right hand have broken so far down I can't just pull them off and get on my way. The skin's actually grown up on the nails so it hurts like a bitch. They're both wrapped in band-aids now and I can't type. And my fingers hurrrrrrrrt.

-11:04 PM