Ivy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ivybgreenflower) wrote2008-05-05 03:55 am
ivybgreenflower) wrote2008-05-05 03:55 am
Entry tags:
Cinco de Mayo
Happy Cinco de Mayo!
I've just been dropped down the rabbit hole after chasing plotbunnies (u see whut I did thar? I made an Alice in Wonderland reference! I r teh awesome) and now, apparently, I'm writing a fantasy novel. I'm at seven pages now. I'd have more, but I had to slow down to transcribe some stuff I wrote in bed. We'll see how this goes. If it goes nowhere, I'll condense it down to a short story and put it here. If it doesn't... well, who knows?
Writing is scary.
What amazes me is that writing is a lot like reading, in that you find out as you're going what's going to happen. I mean, writers usually plan out stuff before it comes out all pretty, but still, even in the planning stages, things just come to you, sometimes, and it's as exciting as if you'd read it in someone else's book. It's as interesting to find things out about your characters as it is to come to love someone else's. It's just as intense writing your own wars and plots and things as it is to watch other people's visions. It's incredibly exciting but it's also frustrating. Unlike in a book, stuff doesn't present itself to you in the logical order and the best ideas come after you've already writen really far in another direction. There's a lot of going back instead of forward, a lot of second-guessing, a lot of really annoying self editing, and a lot of getting stuck in one place and hoping you didn't write yourself into a corner. There's a lot of wondering if there's enough plot, and not just a bunch of interesting people standing around doing nothing. I could have asked for a harder "job", I suppose, but this one's still challenging and tough and although there's a lot of fun and creativity, there's also a lot of frustration, anger, self-doubt (A LOT of self-doubt) and even a little heartbreak, from time to time, when you realize you have to do not so nice things to the characters you've come to love like real people. That's where I get stuck, a lot of times; I've created these people and I love them- how can I hurt them? How can I do bad things to them? One of my new characters is doomed, I already know this. It's happening in a part of this story I'm nowhere near writing yet, but it's necessary for the other characters to really feel it, to really get what's going on; to embrace life and also to take up arms and defend themselves, pretty dresses be damned. The worst part is that as I was realizing this, I didn't know that when I started writing this character I'd end up writing him to be so sweet. When the time comes, it's going to suck to do this to him, and in fact I can already feel myself wimping out. I just hope I do him justice when the time comes. The worst deaths in fiction are the deaths that don't make sense. I hope that doesn't happen.
And, wow, I'm a lot more invested in this than I realized. This probably means I'll stop writing tomorrow and abandon this, but I hope not. I'm really liking this world I've created, and my protagonists.
-4:11 AM
I've just been dropped down the rabbit hole after chasing plotbunnies (u see whut I did thar? I made an Alice in Wonderland reference! I r teh awesome) and now, apparently, I'm writing a fantasy novel. I'm at seven pages now. I'd have more, but I had to slow down to transcribe some stuff I wrote in bed. We'll see how this goes. If it goes nowhere, I'll condense it down to a short story and put it here. If it doesn't... well, who knows?
Writing is scary.
What amazes me is that writing is a lot like reading, in that you find out as you're going what's going to happen. I mean, writers usually plan out stuff before it comes out all pretty, but still, even in the planning stages, things just come to you, sometimes, and it's as exciting as if you'd read it in someone else's book. It's as interesting to find things out about your characters as it is to come to love someone else's. It's just as intense writing your own wars and plots and things as it is to watch other people's visions. It's incredibly exciting but it's also frustrating. Unlike in a book, stuff doesn't present itself to you in the logical order and the best ideas come after you've already writen really far in another direction. There's a lot of going back instead of forward, a lot of second-guessing, a lot of really annoying self editing, and a lot of getting stuck in one place and hoping you didn't write yourself into a corner. There's a lot of wondering if there's enough plot, and not just a bunch of interesting people standing around doing nothing. I could have asked for a harder "job", I suppose, but this one's still challenging and tough and although there's a lot of fun and creativity, there's also a lot of frustration, anger, self-doubt (A LOT of self-doubt) and even a little heartbreak, from time to time, when you realize you have to do not so nice things to the characters you've come to love like real people. That's where I get stuck, a lot of times; I've created these people and I love them- how can I hurt them? How can I do bad things to them? One of my new characters is doomed, I already know this. It's happening in a part of this story I'm nowhere near writing yet, but it's necessary for the other characters to really feel it, to really get what's going on; to embrace life and also to take up arms and defend themselves, pretty dresses be damned. The worst part is that as I was realizing this, I didn't know that when I started writing this character I'd end up writing him to be so sweet. When the time comes, it's going to suck to do this to him, and in fact I can already feel myself wimping out. I just hope I do him justice when the time comes. The worst deaths in fiction are the deaths that don't make sense. I hope that doesn't happen.
And, wow, I'm a lot more invested in this than I realized. This probably means I'll stop writing tomorrow and abandon this, but I hope not. I'm really liking this world I've created, and my protagonists.
-4:11 AM